Jennifer had her company Christmas party last night – no family invited, so I thought it would be a great opportunity for Libby and I to watch a movie in the theater (plus I have been wanting to see the new Muppet movie). I check online and see that there is a 5 o’clock showing, which we can make if I leave work a little early to pick up Libby.
I leave work a little early to pick up Libby, we rush out to the car and while driving to Fugate’s Cinema I really play up the movie, getting Libby all excited about seeing the Muppers. We walk into the cinema at 4:55 and the guy selling tickets says “The first show is at 6:45 p.m.”, I say “Your website says there is a 5 o’clock show” and he replies “Yeah, some guy out of Alabama does our website and those times are never right”. Somehow that’s acceptable?, but that’s not the point of this tale. I convince Libby this is fine, we’ll go home, eat supper, and come back. (This initial visit is a critical part to how ridiculous the rest of the story is).
We go home, eat supper, and get back to the theater at 6:40 p.m. I go up to the ticket booth (it is a different guy this time) and I say “Two tickets to The Muppets, please” and he replies “Yeah, the heat in that theater is not working properly right now”. I say, “So is it hot or cold in the theater?” and he replies “It’s not warm [pause] but I’ll let you guys in for free and if you can’t sit through it you can go next door to see the new Adam Sandler movie.”
Two things – First, there is no way I am taking Libby to an Adam Sandler movie. Second, they couldn’t tell me about the heat problem when we showed up at 5?
We’ll give it a shot. Libby and I buy our Sprite, popcorn, and Twizzlers and head into the theater at exactly 6:45 and encounter two people in there. And what are they watching? – the last 15 minutes of the movie. Apparently, there was an earlier showing that the first ticket person either did not know about or did not want Libby and I to attend.
We settle in, watch the last fifteen minutes of the movie and that is when I notice there is someone else in the theater – Goat Man is hanging out.
Goat Man is a homeless guy that lives in his own little cave/encampment out in the county. He walks everywhere, has long hair and a beard. He wears a top hat most of the time and his clothing is decorated with the teeth and bones of various animals.
Oh and the heat – it was not on at all. There was a little heat leaking through from the adjacent theater, but Libby and I kept on our hats and coats and finished the movie with her snuggled on my lap while I rubbed her legs to keep them warm. After the movie ended and we walked out, Goat Man was outside smoking and I said to him “Great movie” and he replied “Gotta love the muppets”. You said it Goat Man. It was a good evening.
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